Tag Archives: Daily Post Blog

saying YES to NO ~ a sequel

2 Sep

“I really wish I was less of a thinking man and more of a fool not afraid of rejection.”
– Billy Joel

I am not a negative person but many a times saying NO can be theee most positive thing. I have learned it from past experiences ~ a lesson learned the hard way. If you have had difficulties saying NO, you’re not alone. BUT for people used to saying “NO” easily, this post may not “go down” that easily.

As far as I am concerned, I still have difficulties saying “NO” partly because I’m worried how the recipient may feel. Rejection is a scary thing, not only to receive but to give as well.

trying to…

Let us first understand WHEN to say NO:

Obviously when you don’t want to say YES [sick!! I know]

Sometimes we say “Yes” despite wanting to say “NO” because we think we can protect the one we love by saying “Yes” we are protecting our loved one from feeling hurt or offended. It’s a good thing to say “Yes” to Mom’s cookies when you’re full and it’s perfectly all right to nibble on them until you can thank her for the spare tire around your belly area, in the years to come. This is more like “Honesty is NOT ALWAYS the best policy”.

BUT when the person who’s going to get hurt is YOU, that’s when it’s time to say “NO”.

Now HOW to say NO:

Once you learn when it’s time to say NO, you must know how to say it. I’ve always known when to say NO, it’s easy to identify when to say NO but it’s difficult to pin down on HOW to say it. Because let’s face it, you may earn a “selfish” label or a “self-centred” label once you start using NO. The best way is to make excuse. Let’s try it.

http://www.wikihow.com/Say-No-Respectfully

Pretty good advice, I am working on Points 2, 4, 5 and 7.

If you aren’t strong enough [read: if you are as weak as the blogger here], you can practice putting up a blank expression or a frown to say NO. Also, you can pretend not to hear and walk away before the speaker repeats himself/ herself. Just get up and get away from the environment that’s forcing you to say NO, it obviously isn’t a good environment to linger around.

WHAT to do after saying NO:

If your heart thumps like mine after I say NO, well.. personally I think it’s pathetic. But heart’s a heart’s a heart ~ one’s gotta be nice to one’s heart. So let it thump and come back to its normal beat. Once you say NO, don’t regret it. Your NO may not always be right but we all learn through trials and errors. I’ve lost few so-called pals over the years because they couldn’t see me beyond my NO. I wonder if it’s a big loss, though.

Also note that when you say no, it might attract some “labels”. Don’t worry about them. As long as you’re comfortable with your NO, there’s no need to worry about whatever names it may bring you. If people give you names for your NO, ask yourself “Is it worth having them around?” As simple as that.

…errr well… I guess that’s how you can find the “balance”…

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to P who Pays (a monthly visit)

27 Aug

…if you’re a woman and you know it… [errr well] clap your hands [I guess].

 

Well, this post is about Miss P who Pays me a monthly visit and to all the *ladies* out there and maybe JB above [exceptions: Little ladies, Elderly ladies and Expecting ladies].  Miss P is what sets us apart from our male counterparts and thus makes us oh-so-very special.

Before Miss P paid me her first visit, I was used to listening to painful and sometimes scary stories from friends who were well acquainted, already. And so, one sunny Saturday she paid me an unexpected visit ~ seconds later I became a woman (??). I didn’t like her at all. According to my adolescent self, she crippled me; crippled me from running free… [I have changed my mind and become more positive about her, over the years].

Miss P has been nice to me. Maybe, because I had this reservation about her and it’s like she’s trying to prove me wrong. She comes regularly and without any baggage. She warns me before her arrival ~ a gentle knock [i.e. a light tug in the inside of my naval area] and she always comes on weekends. The only time she doesn’t come on weekends is when I am absolutely busy. She is then very considerate about visiting me when I’m likely to have a lot of rest or when there’s a public holiday around. I don’t know how she’s managed to be this good to me, but I feel lucky about all this.

One day a friend remarked, “You always get your period when we’re traveling.”

My answer, “That’s because I always get my period during holidays.”

On the first day of her visit, she’s very easy around me (as if she doesn’t want to burden). The second day, she works efficiently and from the third evening she starts making her absence felt. On the fourth she simply leaves traces as a reminder that she had been there. She leaves quietly on the 5th day until she knocks on the door with a gentle tug again –> next month.

Only recently, when a colleague began complaining about insufferable Miss P who, according to her, comes with cramps, backaches, irregularity and so on did I realise how lucky I’ve always been :knocks on wood: Once in the bluest moon, she does come my way with a little bit of bloating, lethargy and slight exhaustion – but nothing that can’t be cured with a little rest. And like I said earlier, she visits me when I have ample time to rest, I have no excuse [whatsoever] to complain.

It really does take others’ misfortune to count on one’s blessing! I love my Miss P because I know how troublesome she could have been… Period.

on be1ng s1ngle

25 Aug

Being Single

Before I forget the fact that this blog is about me being single, here’s a post on being single. I’ve been carried away as I have been writing for other categories [easier in comparison to this one]. The other categories may not always be about my single life.  If anyone stumbles into my blog, and going by the blog’s name, assumes this blog is about some wild rantings by and on a single-by-choice life, then I want them to find something meaty here. So this is one of many peeks into being single.

There was a time when I wanted to be single and here I am still wanting to be single.

Some things don’t change and am I happy about it.

Why am I happy?

–> Because being single lets me decide who I’d give up my single-hood for. You need not feel guilty even if you are eying someone who’s beyond you – as long as you’re single, you DO have a chance. I have my prospective eights [https://s1ngal.wordpress.com/2012/07/], to whom I’ve dedicated a post and struck a deal with [the deal’s been sealed, signed and approved from my end].

even with all the nudity… I DO guilt-less fancy you…

–> Because being single lets me lose weight easily. How? Well, I’m single and a bad cook, besides. But that’s not it. I’ve noticed one BIG difference between a single’s fridge and others’.  When you’re not single, there’s always food, always : I DARE YOU TO CORRECT ME, anyone??? So now imagine what happens to a pound-wise yet penniless s1ngal who comes back home to an empty fridge. She goes to sleep, empty stomach. Result – weight loss.

 

my mood or MY MOOD

–> Because my life depends on my MOOD. Anything can happen any-when. I make things happen. I want to blog, I blog – whether it’s dinner time, breakfast time,  3.11 am in the morning. Ican wake up in the middle of the night because I realise I’d forgotten to *like* the post that I’d actually liked.

 

 

 

–> Because the TV belongs to me. I can watch whatever I like and not just the recorded versions. I can turn it off at the 89th minute during a football match between Italy and Spain and go to sleep peacefully because I can always google the result, later.

the REMOTE’s mine, I WIN I WIN

–> Because I can talk to a life-sized Teddy who listens and agrees with me in respectful silence… and there isn’t anyone judging me for this. I carry it with me wherever I go, trust me Teddy doesn’t complain. It’s always there for a bear-hug and  turns into a pillow when mine falls off the bed.

more later… i.e. when i can think of some more “because…”

Trust me there are plenty more… because I’m single, I have decided to end

this post here, to be continued later (when I feel like it).

There – one more reason I’m happy being single.

Weekly Photo Challenge: Wrong

10 Aug

Image

If you can’t find anything *WRONG*  in this picture, something’s terribly *WRONG* with you!!

A.M.Bradley

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