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On Moron

20 Dec
  • I’ve recently had the misfortune of meeting a MORON… He is the epitome of MORON and so the only justice I can do him is by calling him a MORON in all caps. 
  • Having to share a room at work with this MORON, I must say is one malicious act of Fortune.

I read it somewhere…

  • This MORON is alive only because we are not Fortunate enough to strangle to death anyone for the criminal act of MORONism.
  • I have this misfortune of sharing my space [at work] with this MORON for this week and the whole week next week….

  • My only compensation, this MORON will be gone by the end of this year. And fortunately I will be bidding all things MORON by the end of this year.  Yippieeeeeeeeeee!

via Daily Prompt: Fortune

Vanish, if you must

5 Dec

People say I am very good at “the vanishing act”. I do not doubt the “people”.  So from an expert, in case you might want to carry out “the vanishing act”, here are 5 things you need to do to VANISH into thin air:

  1. De-activate your Facebook account.
  2. Quit your full-time job, do some freelancing instead.
  3. Get a new mobile number.
  4. Get a new hairstyle.
  5. Travel to a new place (at least for a month).

What makes me the expert???  Well, I have burnt bridges… I have burnt so many of them that if this were literal, I would have ashes measuring the height of [probably] the Eiffel Tower…   Yes, oh yes, I do exaggerate… But then again, I have burnt bridges a lot… you know what I mean…

Do I have regret burning bridges?  No.  When you know the bridges are weighing you down, methinks it’s better to burn them instead of getting weighed down.  As a young woman, I wasted my time and energy in trying to save the bridges that were drowning me.  Then, I used to think that the only way to keep myself from drowning was to be weighed down by the bridge that was already under water.  So, no regrets, whatsoever.

Although I do think of the relationships that I have had to forsake.  They were good friends… great friends… at one point of time.  Misunderstanding, miscommunication, misapprehension, misreading expressions, misleading conclusions, mistaken mistakes and many more mis-es led up to the demise of such relationships.  I say demise because these burnt bridges, these ended friendships, can never be rebuilt, can never be rekindled.

Soon, we learn to leave with who we have.  Soon, we don’t need the urge to vanish. Soon, other people will fill the places left vacant.  Slowly we heal, and surely with scars.

So, let us not worry about vanishing, if that helps us give our “self” back.  So, let us not worry about burning bridges, if that helps us from keeping afloat.  So let us vanish if we must!!!

via Daily Prompt: Vanish

Disintegrating the Panoply

3 Dec

Panoply = Pa No Ply… this one’s like a request to Pa not to Ply…

Panoply = Pan o’ ply… this one’s like pan of fly (with a slip of the tongue lips)

Panoply = Pa Nop Ly… this is like threatening Pa not to lie anymore but like in “texting” language

Panoply = Pano Ply… this is like someone yelling “Piano Play” in an accent unheard of.

Panoply = Pan up Lee… this is like monopoly with a pan… errrrr… well this one could be the real panoply… like the real real panoply…

panoply
ˈpanəpli/
noun
noun: panoply; plural noun: panoplies
  1. an extensive or impressive collection.
    “a deliciously inventive panoply of insults”
    synonyms: array, range, collection

    “the full panoply of America’s military might”

Disclaimer: I post posts like the one above when I’m at my wit’s end.  It is also important to note here that I’m usually at my wit’s end… it’s like my wit’s always at end and so it often is a wonder why I’m blogging… errr or rather pretending to blog… But then again, this is just a disclaimer.  Peace Out!

via Daily Prompt: Panoply

Oh Echo

1 Dec

1.

ECHO))))))))))))))))))))

WEYKOH…. EYKOH… EYKO… EKO… KO… KO… O…. O….. O…. o……. o…………

OR is it this way…?

2.

ECHO))))))))))))))))))))

WEYKOH…. WEYKO… WEYK… WEYK… WEY… WEY… EY…. Ey….. ey…. ey…….

3.

Echo [???] – a gecko without the /ɡ/

4.

Echo friendly [?!?] – Eco friendly with an ‘h’

5.

There are days when the moment you LOOK  0_0 at the prompt and words swoop rushing in… and then there are days when you LOOK, stare, LOOK on, stare on, on and on and on and on until you wish that sights could start echoing… but sights no make echos, only sounds make them so… and so once again a post that makes less than zilch meaning.


And once again… yes I write to write… and Daily Prompts do help.


via Daily Prompt: Echo

Daily Prompt: Culture

29 Nov

If Turkish [a character from the film Snatch] were to answer to today’s daily prompt… this is how he might do –>

What do I know about Culture?  I was a happy boxing promoter…

However, I’m not Turkish [neither from the film nor of that descent].  So for me culture could mean many many things…. I’ll try to point out 5 of those, just to fit in MY 5 category.

  1. Agriculture The culture that gives us our “daily bread”
  2. Horticulture This culture gives us flowers, I believe
  3. Yogurt cultures These are the bacteria that are apparently used in making yogurt
  4. Blood culture This one is “…a test that looks for germs such as bacteria or fungi in the blood…” [source]
  5. Culture Shock: [Dictionary meaning]

    noun the feeling of disorientation experienced by someone when they are suddenly subjected to an unfamiliar culture, way of life, or set of attitudes.


via Daily Prompt: Culture

my Chaotic life

24 Nov
When I wasn’t working, my life was chaotic, a bit literally and a bit not so literally.

Chaotic House: I was lazy to such an extent that my place always had that recently-bombed look.  Things were everywhere… every night my bed had to be found [discovered] under the rubble of everything that had happened that day… [early morning afternoon] I had to tiptoe my way out… it was like walking through a filed of mines for fear of smashing those “everything” that would be lying on the floor…

Chaotic Eating:  There was hardly any time for breakfast… by the time I got up and got out of the minefield, it would be almost past noon… So if I was hungry, I’d still wait for the time to be late afternoon or at least 2 pm to have my first meal… by now I’d be so starved I could eat a whale… and so I’d feast like a king… then I’d be so stuffed that there was no way I could eat another morsel for the rest of the day…

Now I’ve started working, and I’ll be working for a few months straight… so my life is just plain chaotic.

Chaotic House:  Earlier it was the laziness that kept me from keeping a straight house… now I do not have time to clean up… my house is still a minefield…

Chaotic Eating:  I hardly have time to fix myself some breakfast in the morning… at lunch break there is just too many things to do [there’s always something that urgently needs to get done just around lunch time]… so tea tea tea tea tea tea… I grab cookies here, crumbs there, fries here, apple there… tea tea tea tea tea…

Chaotic Weekends: I didn’t know weekends could be so taxing and so less relaxing…  I had so many things to do this last weekend… getting up late didn’t help either… there was laundry to be done…  Having to go to work means having to wear clean clothes… it isn’t like hanging out in pj’s all day… while Saturday thus slipped by, Sunday was over in the blink of an eye…

via Daily Prompt: Chaotic

Antsy in Anticipation

23 Nov

I have always felt that “antsy” and “anticipation” go hand in hand.  And before too long, slowly yet surely, anticipation becomes synonymous to ANXIETY.

In which case, I wonder… Why do we even anticipate?

But I do know, it’s easier said than done.  We do not get antsy or anxious because we want to anticipate… Anticipation just happens!

  • Buying gifts for friends and family [Will they like it?  Will they love it?]
  • Dressing up [Is this good enough?  Would I look better in the other dress?]
  • Going to sleep [Will I miss the alarm?  Will I turn off the alarm and forget to get up?]
  • Having a conversation [Will I forget what I’m about to say?]
  • Opening a present [Will I like what’s inside the box?  Will my disappointment unintentionally be reflected on my face?]

 

Knowing whatever will be will be we still anticipate what will be…!


via Daily Prompt: Anticipation

the Aromatic sense

21 Nov

If I close my left eye, what I usually see is a blur… blurred texts… blurred faces… blurred blurs.  If I close my right eye, I can see things crystal clear.  So, I wear glasses because I have to wear glasses.

My favourite escapade – Music – Earphones – full volume… I have this amazing capacity to zone out… vanish from the “scene”… all I ever needed was my iPod and it worked like magic… The magic however has affected my hearing…

I am not a foodie-foodie if you know what I mean.  I am the kind of a person who eats to live and not the one who lives to eat.  When it comes to food, I can eat everything under the sun if I’m hungry and turn away from the most appealing food when I’m not.

I am not much of a touchy-feely person either…  I can’t tell silk from polyester nor linen from cotton.  I can hardly tell the difference.

And so, I am really only proud of my fifth sense, that of smell!  I always thought that I had the unique capacity to recall memories at the whiff of something aromatic… And then I read the novel Perfume.  I couldn’t believe the words in the novel… the words spoke of  my experience… I got so spooked that I couldn’t read it beyond the first page.  It rang so true that I didn’t want to read any further.  Years later, I did finish reading the novel and by then I had come to realise that there are lots of people out there with the same sort of olfactory experience… and that no NOVEL was yet written about me [sad, this discovery was].

It’s amazing how a certain aroma can bring back memories that have been stored and stowed away for good… finding an old diary and reading the words in it may not bring alive the experience but one sniff of an old perfume bottle does the magic.  This is one reason why whenever I begin a new journey or decide to turn a new leaf in life, the first thing I do is buy a new bottle of perfume.

Every relationship I had has a certain bottle labelled to it.  Every milestone has one bottle dedicated to it.  These near-empty aromatic bottles are my TIME MACHINE!

via Daily Prompt: Aromatic

Filthy Confession

16 Nov

There are some things I do of which I can never actually be proud of.  Like some fetish,  I do  have some filthy confessions to make (in utmost honesty).

PROCEED WITH CAUTION… Filth ahead!!!

  • Growing up with a big brother, I grew up wanting to be a “boy“.  No, it wasn’t about being able to pee standing… it was just about being a boy…  I played out this childhood fantasy by sneaking into my brother’s room and sneaking out with his OVERSIZE sneakers on – a truly “in his shoes” kinda phase.  What happened next very easily and quickly put an end to this fantasising.  My feet began to smell, to filthy stink, and it wasn’t until a year or so when it finally stopped.  Lesson learned the filthy way.

  • Long before I began sneaking into my brother’s room for his shoes, I used to sneak in to steal from his piggy bank.  Although stealing his shoes had a great lesson to learn from, nothing fearful came out of stealing from his piggy bank except the guilt.

  • When I used to smoke, one of the most filthy things I ever did was to pick up stubs from the street for a few drags.  In my defence, I did those only when I was too broke to buy a cigarette.  Looking back, I cannot believe I actually had done such a filthy thing.
  • I am lazy but that’s no confession.  I hate doing the cleaning and the laundry.  I have a laundry basket – a HUGE one.  The clothes piled in this basket get used and reused a long time before they actually hit the machine.  Well, let me elaborate.  The first pile in this basket is a normal – “to wash” pile.  Once all my clothes (wearable) pile up in this pile, I sort out the not-very-dirty ones and wear them a few times.  The second pile is the – “can’t wear them without a wash” pile.  Very soon, I run out of clothes to wear again and the pile doesn’t get washed itself.  From the second pile, I choose the “can manage one last time without a wash” clothes and wear them.  The third pile is the “even the most expensive perfumes won’t help” pile.  And yes, reluctantly then I do wash these! 

  • Once upon a time, I used to bite my nails but that’s not the confession.  My filthy confession is that I used to salivate at the sight of other people’s tempting nails – oh, the sheer temptation that I had to fight!    

Gross, I know!  Filthy enough!!

via Daily Prompt: Filthy

No Second Thoughts

8 Nov

I start work tomorrow. No second thoughts allowed.  No pun intended.

Life will return to normal aka mundane.  No staying up till late for no other reasons than staring at the ceiling.  No getting up early in the afternoons.  No longer will there be breakfast at 1 pm.  No longer will I be looking EAGERLY forward to lazing around.

is anyone starting work tomorrow??

Hmm.  I do not know what the “President Elect” will do when she starts work tomorrow!

I can only speak for myself.  This one will have NO time in her hands, because she will be in the hands of TIME, at TIME’s mercy.    

  • The alarm clock will wake the reluctant me up every morning.  No second thoughts, no defying.  Downing cold cold cereals in the cold cold morning is something I wouldn’t want to start my day with.
  • Get dressed.  Tick-tock.  Skip the make-up.  Tick-tock.  Walk to the bus stop.  Tick-tock.  Scratch that.  Run.  Tick-tock.  Tick-tock.  Run for your life.  Tick-tock.  Tick-tock.  Run till you can’t breathe any longer.  Tick-fkin-tock.  Catch the bus!  Yaye!!!  Miss the bus.  Tick-tock-tick-tock-tick-tock.  Run.  Run till you drop dead.
  • Clocking-in.  Aaargh.  You are now officially clocked in.  You are officially “working”.
  • Hungry?  Starving??  Don’t feel like eating???  Who the folks cares!!  The clock says it is a certain hour and you HAVE lunch – eat, nibble, chew, devour, swallow, sip, slurp, throw up if you must later.  It’s THE lunch break.
  • Watch how the hour hand never ever budges off its lazy warm ass.  Watch how the minute hand tortures you, teases you, bloody “harasses” you till you break down into million pieces.  The only good friend is the second hand, goes all the way in the same tick tock tick tock rhythm.  The second hand is your best friend – period – for the next three months.

I am doomed for the next three months cause A girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do and also cause Money still don’t grow on trees (no matter how many times you wish on the shooting stars).  I can’t believe I start work the same day the first US Lady President does… but she can’t stop after three months.  So who’s the winner eh!!

:GRINS:

via Daily Prompt: Second Thoughts

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