Tough times

I’m going through a rough period in my life. The last 2 days have been awful with my finance depleting at a supersonic speed. My nerves too are on the verge of becoming extinct because a co-worker’s been getting on them :@ a little TOO MUCH.

Luckily, being s1ngle does give me the pleasure of blaming “this period” to being s1ngle. These are times when I wish the wishful thinking, sighing “If I had a boyfriend/ a fiance/ a husband/ an ex……” Whoa!!! I DO HAVE AN EX 😀 As soon as it dawned on me that I DO HAVE AN EX, I picked up the phone and almost called him to discuss things (the things happening to me are actually beyond me/ my understanding).

What made me stop –

1. I’ve always solved my problem by myself (regardless of any regards) and if I do/ did call him, I’ll be listening to his problems more than talking about mine. I’m pretty sure he has problems (he used to have them all the time so all the time includes NOW, if I’m not wrong).
2. If I did call him and luckily if he were without problems, would things happening to me not be beyond him/ his understanding?
3. If I did call him and luckily if he were to be without problems and perhaps he would understand things happening to me…. but how in the hell was I expecting to explain the things happening to me when in fact it’s actually beyond me/ my understanding?
4. Do I even have a problem?? What was the problem again??? If the problems are beyond me, could I be actually having problems????
5. Last but not the least, I don’t have my ex’s number because I had deleted it when I decided to enjoy my single-hood. I must thank my good fortune here because… imagine calling one’s ex and having to explain problems beyond one’s understanding and so forth just to realise the fourth point above.

Well, I’m lucky to be single. When things go wrong, I can always pin it on being single. And the luckiest part is finding out it isn’t.